Auburn California

Self-Care When Life Falls Apart

Seizures Happen We were at the hospital once again. Another seizure. We were used to the seizures. Our youngest son started having them at two years old. He had 50 to 100 petite mals per day and periodic grand mal seizures. (Or absence seizures and tonic clonic seizures) Only this time – my four year old son’s seizure lasted over forty five minutes. And this time – the whole family felt the tremendous shock and trauma of the seizure. My oldest son locked the door as we waited for the ambulance to arrive. When I asked him what he was… Continue Reading This Article

The Importance of Hula Hoops in Your Relationship

marriage relationship

The Principle of the Hula Hoop I think one of the most important things a couple can do to improve their relationship is to learn and practice the principle of “Staying In Your Own Hula Hoop.” What I mean is it is so very easy to point the finger at our partner and talk about how they are making the marital relationship difficult. It’s easy to become focused on how desperately we want them to change, isn’t it? After all, if you knew the person we had to live with, you’d want them to change too, wouldn’t you? Focusing on… Continue Reading This Article

Signs You Have A Holiday Hang-Over & How To Recover

grief

Are you still hearing a lot of “How were your holidays?” or “I hope your holidays were wonderful?” And each time you hear these questions – you’re cringing inside. Perhaps you are just beginning to come to the realization you have a Holiday Hang-Over. It’s going to take some time and effort to recover from the emotional let-down you feel from the less-than-perfect holiday season. You’re not alone. You’re not weird to feel a sense of loss weeks after the holidays are actually over. People are feeling it all over the world. Some have felt it for years – after… Continue Reading This Article

Owning Your Part When You Hurt The Dance

couples marriage

Remember what Maya Angelou said? “When someone shows you how they feel, believe them the first time.” But what if you’re the one who did the injury? What if you’re the person who hurt your partner in marriage, your close friend, a colleague or worse yet, someone you barely know? How do you repair the relationship and earn back the trust you broke? What To Do When You’ve Hurt You’re Loved One 1. Think About What Happened What was going on for you when you said or did what you did? How do you think the other person felt? How… Continue Reading This Article

How Hurts Can Make The Relationship Dance Sweeter

couples marriage

Maya Angelou once said, “When someone shows you who they are, Believe them -the first time.” My daughter can do an excellent imitation of Maya Angelou stating this encouragement. She always makes me either smile or groan when she quotes Ms. Angelou. It really depends on the occasion and the subject. And believe you me, throughout the years of childhood, adolescents and young adulthood, we have had many an opportunity to quote this statement in our household. Faithful friends and not-so-faithful friends are difficult to sort through. “But – How does this apply to me,” you ask? Well – Sit… Continue Reading This Article

Stonewalling – The Ultimate Weapon of Destruction For Couples

couples

Have you ever heard yourself saying, “I feel like I’m talking to a wall?” or “I might as well be talking to myself!” Has anyone been saying these statements to you lately? If so, you might have Stonewalling as part of the Destructive Dance to your relationship. But, wait. It can get worse. –If both of you have begun to practice Stonewalling, there is a strong probability the relationship is circling the drain. The results of Dr. John Gottman’s research showed Stonewalling to be one of the most destructive behaviors in a relationship. It’s one of the 4 Horsemen we… Continue Reading This Article

The Why’s of Contempt for Couples

couples

Hey, there. We’re continuing on in figuring out how couples can let their relationships deteriorate and slip into some Destructive Dances of relating to each other. We started at the Marriage-Relationship Saga. We’re going to keep walking together – persevering – learning about the Destructive 4 Horsemen Dr. John Gottman researched. It’s hard, isn’t it? Sometimes looking at the ways we have treated each other in the past, or are treating each other currently, is truly painful and lonely. My hope is you will be encouraged. So- Remember how I said in the last blog that I was going to… Continue Reading This Article

My 4 Inspirational Blogs to Inspire and Comfort You

counseling Kate Pieper spiritual

I love to be inspired, don’t you? I love to inspire others. But the only way I can inspire others is to be inspired first. Paul talks about comfort in 2 Corinthians 1:3. He goes about basically saying, “We comfort from the comfort we have been comforted with.” Do you know what that means? That means I want to learn from those who have felt the pain. I want to learn from those who have dared to feel pain – Been vulnerable – Received comfort. When I think about leaders I want to follow and be inspired by, I think… Continue Reading This Article

Being Intentional About Rest

We’ve all been there. Hurrying through our week. Working hard to make a living. And then, the weekend comes! Time to rest. Right? Not right. We’ve lost the “Intentional Rest” we used to practice as families. With the soccer games, swim team, softball practices, shopping and yard work. We have miscellaneous activities to accomplish on the weekends. Families have lost the ability to rest. We’ve lost the importance of rest. Not very long ago, I got a hold of John Ortberg’s book, ‘Soul Keeping.‘ Ortberg talks about what it is to take care of the most important part of us…. Continue Reading This Article

How to Handle Couple Criticism

Are you a part of a couple where it is starting to feel like you can’t do anything right in your relationship? You make a decision with the kids and get second-guessed. You wear something, only to hear, “You’re not wearing that, are you?” Sometimes it might feel like whether you eat, breathe, or move there’s always a negative comment coming from your partner. We’ve talked about Solutions for the Culprit of Criticizing. Now, let’s talk about How to Handle being the Criticized. How do a lot of people handle the “drip, drip, drip” of a critical partner? And how… Continue Reading This Article